Enemies of Reason Poundshop potshots at the media moral maze.

A victory for greed

WILL YOU WIN £50? WILL YOU? MIGHT YOU WIN £50? THINK ABOUT IT. FIFTY POUNDS IS A LOT OF MONEY TO YOU.

GREED. GREEDY. DO YOU WANT THE MONEY? DO YOU? DO YOU WANT IT? IT MIGHT BE INSIDE. DON'T BE BAD GREEDY LIKE THE BAD GREEDY MAN. BE GOOD GREEDY. TAKE THE MONEY. MONEY. FIFTY POUNDS. THINK OF ALL THE CORNED BEEF YOU CAN HAVE WITH THAT. MONEY. REAL MONEY. IS REAL MONEY INSIDE? MONEY. COLD, HARD CASH. FIFTY POUNDS WILL BUY YOU AN AWFUL LOT OF DAILY MAILS. WHY NOT BUY MORE DAILY MAILS WITH THE FIFTY POUNDS YOU FIND INSIDE THE DAILY MAIL? WALLPAPER THE WHOLE HOUSE WITH IT. USE IT TO STOP LEAKS IN THE BATHROOM. LINE THE BUDGIE'S CAGE. GO ON. FIFTY QUID. FIFTY WHOLE BRITISH POUNDS. GREEDY. GO ON, GREEDY. THERE MIGHT BE MONEY IN THE PAPER. GO ON. YOU LOVE IT. YOU BLOODY LOVE IT. GO ON. BUY THE PAPER. BUY IT. THERE MIGHT BE MONEY INSIDE. REAL, CRISP, LOVELY MONEY. MONEY. YOU LOVE MONEY, DON'T YOU? I THINK YOU DO. I THINK YOU LOVE IT. DO YOU LOVE IT? YOU LOVE IT. HAVE THE MONEY. GO ON. ENJOY THE MONEY. MM, LOVELY MONEY. YOU COULD BUY A WHOLE BOX OF TWIXES, JUST FOR A LAUGH, AND THEN THROW THEM AT DUCKS ALL DAY. WHY DON'T YOU DO THAT? YOU WANT TO REALLY. BUT YOU CAN DO ANYTHING WITH MONEY. REAL MONEY. LOVELY MONEY. GORGEOUS, BEAUTIFUL, POUTING CASH. MONEY. YOUR MONEY. MONEY FOR YOU. MONEY THAT'S YOURS. FEEL IT CRINKLING IN YOUR FINGERTIPS. OH YES. MONEY. THE LOOK OF IT. THE FEEL OF IT. THE SMELL OF IT. OH YES. THAT'S THE SMELL OF MONEY ALL RIGHT. THE MONEY YOU WANT. THE MONEY WE'RE GOING TO GIVE YOU. BECAUSE WE WANT YOU NOT TO BE GREEDY. NOT GREEDY LIKE THE BAD MAN AND THE OTHER BAD MAN DOWN THERE. NO, YOU'RE NOT GREEDY LIKE THEM. YOU JUST WANT SOME MONEY. WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT? NOTHING, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT. NOTHING AT ALL. GO ON, BUY THE PAPER AND GET ANGRY AT THE GREEDY MAN. AND YOU MIGHT GET SOME MONEY. PROPER MONEY. MONEY YOU MIGHT ENJOY. MONEY YOU CAN HAVE ALL FOR YOURSELF. MONEY. HAVE THE MONEY.

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