NEW figures have exploded the myth of a so-called 'beneficial' impact of the British press, proving that ALL bad journalism is done by the Daily Express.
The research shows that 4,433,384 bullshitting articles full of skewed statistics and dog-whistles to racists were published in the British press over the past year - meaning that ALL of them must have been printed by the Express.
Richard Desmond's rotting flagship has previously claimed to be "Britain's Greatest Newspaper", implying that its journalism has a benign effect on the British press. But these new figures, about stories demonising foreigners and exaggerating the impact of immigration, show starkly the secret Express cover-up which has betrayed British readers.
A total of 56,448,326 stories distorting statistics about immigration were published in Britain last year. But once we discount those published by the Mail, Star, Sun and all other publications, and change the definition of 'story', then do a bit more tinkering, cherry-pick the figures we want and ignore the ones we don't, then change the time span and the nationalities involved, and take a great leap indeed by claiming that the Express is a newspaper at all, we are left with just those from the Express.
John Bastard, from LyingBastardWatch, said: "Now we can see the true impact of the Express's disastrous policy of claiming to be representing the news while in fact just rattling off the same old drivel time after time, regardless of its relationship to reality.
"They may say that they have some kind of good effect on British newspapers, but these figures show that's not the case.
"And just anything else you'd like me to add at this point. Just fill in whatever you like and get back to me."
A spokesman for the Daily Express said: "Na na na-na nahhhh, we can't hear you."