Why there is nothing ‘natural’ about the life of Jan Moir

I was quite surprised this week. Ordinarily, when someone famous dies, it only takes about five minutes for the tabloid attack squad to move in, decide it was their fault and rip apart their life for no reason whatsoever. But Stephen Gately's death seemed to catch the hatemongers on the hop.

Until today. Here's Jan Moir:

Why there was nothing 'natural' about Stephen Gately's death

...except that he died of natural causes, you mean? Jan, though, has recognised her tardiness in sticking the boot into the fresh corpse of Gateley; she's now doing it in advance to other celebrities who might die soon:

Robbie, Amy, Kate, Whitney, Britney; we all know who they are. And we are not being ghoulish to anticipate, or to be mentally braced for, their bad end: a long night, a mysterious stranger, an odd set of circumstances that herald a sudden death.

No, it's not ghoulish at all to expect someone else's death, Jan. You tell yourself that. You cackling witch.

A founder member of Ireland's first boy band, he was the group's co-lead singer, even though he could barely carry a tune in a Louis Vuitton trunk.
He was the Posh Spice of Boyzone, a popular but largely decorous addition.

Keep going, Jan, I don't think you've been unpleasant enough yet. How about turning into Quincy and deciding you know better than the coroner?

Even before the post-mortem and toxicology reports were released by the Spanish authorities, the Gatelys' lawyer reiterated that they believed his sudden death was due to natural causes.
But, hang on a minute. Something is terribly wrong with the way this incident has been shaped and spun into nothing more than an unfortunate mishap on a holiday weekend, like a broken teacup in the rented cottage.

What killed him then, Jan? Being gay?

Whatever the cause of death is, it is not, by any yardstick, a natural one. Let us be absolutely clear about this. All that has been established so far is that Stephen Gately was not murdered.

Er, no, dying from fluid on the lungs is natural and unfortunately does happen to people with congenital heart conditions. It's rare, but it does happen all the time - just not to celebrities. That's probably why Moir doesn't know.

After a night of clubbing, Cowles and Gately took a young Bulgarian man back to their apartment. It is not disrespectful to assume that a game of canasta with 25-year-old Georgi Dochev was not what was on the cards.

Ah, I see. Yes, they were gay, therefore they obviously had sex with him. If that's what you think, Jan, don't be shy. If all gay people are by their very nature promiscuous then just pop up and say it, Jan. No-one will think the less of you. Because no-one could think any less of you.

Gately's family have always maintained that drugs were not involved in the singer's death, but it has just been revealed that he at least smoked cannabis on the night he died.
Nevertheless, his mother is still insisting that her son died from a previously undetected heart condition that has plagued the family.

BECAUSE HE DID, YOU FLAMING FUCKWIT. Tell you what, you do a few years of medical training, order a second postmortem, you carve up the corpse, then you come out with your half-baked "one spliff killed him" bullshit. Otherwise, maybe the people who do it for a living know that they might be talking about...?

For Jan, though, it's not about the one spliff which killed Gately. It's the fact he was gay.

Gay activists are always calling for tolerance and understanding about same-sex relationships, arguing that they are just the same as heterosexual marriages. Not everyone, they say, is like George Michael.

Of course, in many cases this may be true. Yet the recent death of Kevin McGee, the former husband of Little Britain star Matt Lucas, and now the dubious events of Gately's last night raise troubling questions about what happened.

What the fuck do you mean by that? Kevin McGee killed himself after battling with drug addiction - it wasn't anything to do with his civil partnership as that had long since broken up. Is Jan Moir really trying to link drug use with being gay? Or saying that civil partnerships will lead to death? Or what is she trying to do?

Whatever it is, it's more seedy and disgusting than what she claims is to blame for Stephen Gately's death. Someone as decent and ordinary as Gately dies, yet Jan Moir lives. It's just not fair.

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