Today's Mail has a creepily written feature about the female presenter on Countdown, Rachel Riley, illustrated with the kind of masturbatory freeze-frames that are truly disturbing - look, here's a woman bending over slightly so you can have a look at a quarter of an inch more cleavage than you might otherwise have done; here's a freeze-frame of her standing by the Countdown board in a dress that shows that she possesses legs.
If the photos make you shiver at the stalkerishness of it all, then you'd better put down that sandwich before you read the words. Sometimes it seems like the Mail writes like a sex-crazed old codger having a lazy wank under a tartan blanket:
While she looked more suitably dressed for a night on the town, it was business as usual as the 23-year-old blonde performed her routine of getting the vowels and consonants on to the board.
Later she added up the results of her revealing choice of attire as she led the numbers game with the show's contestants.
It comes as the second time this week she has poured her figure into a daring dress, having worn a short pink dress on Monday, prompting the question - is this a ploy to pull in the viewers?
Of course the Mail wouldn't ever try and 'pull in readers' with dribbling garbage like this, would it? It's not as if the Countdown mock-outrage is anything other than an excuse to print screengrabs of the '23-year-old blonde' in a middle-market newspaper, is it?
And another irony: in a story about a word game, this delightful sentence appears:
Since she took up the mantle in January with Jeff Stelling, ratings have fell from 1.3million to 650,000.
Ratings have fell, have they?
PS Elsewhere in today's Mail: Cheryl Cole in a see-through top! Katy Perry getting her breasts touched in 'wet and wild' video shoot! Sugababes shoot raunchy video!
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