Most of us have had them by now. And we've all thought of stuff to do with them. The cat litter tray is a good idea, for example, as is the bin under a pile of rotting potato peelings. The smooth, shiny texture isn't really absorbent enough to wipe your arse with, and there's enough shit in the leaflet already without you needing to add to it. No, I knew there had to be some better, more creative thing to do.
Let's not stop at papier mache Mosques though, much though that's going to be great. (Can I just ask that it's an almost full-size Mosque, with a full-volume call to prayer played through loudspeakers five times a day? That would be great.)
Is there anything else we can make out of our BNP leaflets to mean those trees weren't cut down purely for the purposes of hatred? Is there some other way we can turn them into something positive and good? I think it's time to dust off those old Susan Stranks books and see if there isn't something truly marvellous we can do with a few bits of string and a blob of Copydex.
Here are just some suggestions. You may have others:
- A life-sized model of Nick Griffin, complete with red clown's nose. On top of a fucking great big bonfire of unread and thrown-away BNP leaflets. Set fire to outside his house.
- A giant union jack flag covered with the faces of Britain's leading black and Asian politicians, business people, sports people and entertainers. Flown outside Griffin's house.
- Re-delivered leaflets to every home in Britain, with a sticker on the front saying "This is a complete load of bullshit from racist scum. We know the rest of them are shite, but no-one's as shite as the BNP".
Incidentally, it was most welcome to see the Daily Mail calling the BNP "vile racists and thugs" today. Unfortunately, their readers appear to have disagreed with this assessment, if you care to have a look at the comments. Oh well, that's the price you pay for telling lies about immigration all the time...
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