Enemies of Reason Poundshop potshots at the media moral maze.

The Sun and porn ‘shame’

I love the balls of steel of the press. It's what makes them as entertaining as they are infuriating. And you can't help but adolescently chuckle when you see a headline like this:

Tee hee. Q good.

Hold on, though. Why on earth should watching a pornographic film be considered "XXX movie shame" by The Sun?

After all, masturbation is considered an important leisure activity for Sun readers, given that alongside the news and current affairs coverage of which it is so wrongly proud there are pictures of scantily-clad ladies - on page 3, posed for your viewing pleasure with their knockers out and some absolute nuts about "Ooh I don't know about all this global warming malarkey" drivel in a brightly coloured panel for your enjoyment while you're spluffing away. Wankers are quite the target market for the Sun, in every sense.

Why, then, so prudish all of a sudden when they're talking about Jacqui Smith's husband? Would it be better if he'd knocked one out to one of the Sun's Page 3 'babes' and then claimed a copy of the Currant back off expenses? Do you think they would have made a right old fuss about that and called it a 'shame'? No...? Then why is having an old-fashioned Tommy to a softcore porno in the comfort of your own home such a 'shame'? Where's the shame in that, for a newspaper that encourages men all over the country to buff the banana?

I'm not too snooty about this. You can't help but realise it's funny for a geezer to claim back a bit of knuckle-shuffle off his wife's expenses. That in itself is a bit of a farce. It's childish to chortle, yes, but it's a story. That it's part of a campaign to get at Jacqui Smith is the annoying part. Sack her for being illiberal; sack her for being wrong about a million and one things; sack her for being stupid; sack her for ignoring people who don't agree with her tabloid-friendly views; sack her for not giving a shit about destroying freedoms in the name of a 'war on terror'; sack her for all those things. But a bit of expenses silliness? Put it into perspective. If she goes, another New Labour cookie-cutter minister will get shunted into place, to do exactly the same illiberal, disgraceful things, just without the whiff of naughtiness attached. That won't change anything.

The Sun, meanwhile, has found a porn star with the same name as Jacqui, who sympathises with her husband; and there's also another porn star, who doesn't. So, intrinsically balanced, you have to say. And there are handy pictures of them not wearing many clothes in case all this talk of porn got you a bit tumescent. There are also stories today about a 'stunning PE teacher facing the sack after being spotted on net in skimpy undies', 'Brazilian babe Gisele' posing for a 'sizzling set of nude photos' and 'Leggy Jennifer Ellison showing off the bum that was voted the best in Britain'.

No 'shame' in any of that, obviously.

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