I don't urge confrontation or aggression on this blog: here you have the chance to do some good, to thank those who have raised their heads about the parapet and been sniped at by complete fuckwits.
Earlier on, I asked for people to write nice letters to a wonderful headteacher who had slagged off the racist BNP as racists. Now I'm asking as many people as possible to write to Jim Van Den Bos at Wealden District Council. You can find him at Jim.VanDenBos@wealden.gov.uk and I'm sure he'd appreciate a bit of positive fan mail following Noel Edmonds's Partridgesque excoriation at the weekend.
Unlike Edmonds, who claims not to be paid a penny for doing Noel's HQ (you were robbed, Sky One), I'm sure Jim gets only a meagre salary for putting together press releases and dealing with media inquiries from people who represent slightly unhinged bearded celebrities. He must have been annoyed by being ripped into by a close-to-tears Edmonds at the weekend surrounded by a baying mob of viewers with giant sponge fingers all ready to rail at 'Bonkers Britain'.
So here's what I've written to Mr Van Den Bos:
Firstly, you don't know me and you've almost certainly never heard of me. I'm just a humble nobody off the internet, blogging away with a hangover. But I thought I'd try and write to you in a week when you've been on the receiving end of a right old torrent of abuse from Noel Edmonds, hopefully to cheer you up, but also to thank you for indirectly giving me one of the greatest TV moments of my life.
Watching Mr Blobby staring into wide-eyed straight into the camera, visibly shaking with anger, as he repeatedly told you off, is truly one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Sure, I know he was serious and he meant it with real passion, but he ended up looking like a tit in a trance, quite frankly, didn't he?
Can I just pull you up about one thing, though, Jim. Your description of Noel's HQ as 'light entertainment' is probably a little wide of the mark. I don't think it's ever entertained anyone, except unintentionally. Part of me wants it to carry on, just so we can watch Noel's deepening descent towards messianic preaching and the almost inevitable TV oblivion that should result; but the better part of me feels that he may be in a very tragic place and probably needs to be left alone.
Please don't be put off your work by a multimillionaire's dreadful vanity project. And thanks once again for giving me such a great laugh.
Go on, let's be nice to the poor fella.