It's come to something, hasn't it, when the very sound - not the sight, but the sound - of a man's tonger is enough to have pearl-clutching twinset-dwellers the length and breadth of Dorking reaching for the smelling salts and the oriental fan. I mean, what the jiminy?
So whatshisface from that TV programme, you know, the American/Scottish one, slipped out the old chap while being interviewed on the radio the other day. So what? It was on the radio. If the sight of a grown man's cock and balls is too terrible for you to contemplate, then fear not, because, let me emphasise once again, it was on the ruddy radio. Unless you've got especially sensitive hearing, so sensitive you can hear the gentle flop of a man's genitals, you're not going to be terrifically upset about it, are you? Oh, unless you're a total fucking idiot.
Not just a man's winkle, mark you - but a winkle belonging to a man who is 'not as other men'! Thereby adding to the shock, the depravity, the evil, the downright shame of it all! Not just your normal tonger, but one of those perverted benders' ones! Eek! Imagine what might have happened - had this been on TV, and not on the fucking radio - had young people been able to see it! They may have instantly been turned to teh gayz! Horrors!
The press complaining about a prick on Radio 1 - then how come Moyles isn't on the front page of the Mail every day? (Bdmtish.)