Littlecock's offering today is a 'hilarious' (according to everyone whose comments have been published by the Mail mods) parody of Hercule Poirot interrogating witnesses to the Corfu yacht saga. This bit caught my eye though, when Poirot is speaking to Lord Mandelay (Peter Mandelson! Innit!):
Indeed, we have, Lord Mandelay. I was a guest at the ambassador's residence in Bruxelles when you were living in the Rue des Jeunes Garcons. Perhaps you don't remember being introduced to me.
"Rue des Jeunes Garcons" means "Young boys Road". Not 'young men' but 'young boys'. Surely you'd use "Jeunes Hommes" if you meant "young lads" or "young men" or "young blokes", wouldn't you?
Littlecock always ensures he has plausible deniability against any accusations, so let's assume his will be this:
1. Whoops sorry, I didn't realise 'garcon' meant 'boy' and not 'lad' or 'man'.
2. 'Garcon' also means 'waiter', doesn't it? So I didn't mean 'boys', I mean 'waiters'. Yes, that's right. I didn't mean to imply that Mandelson's a paedophile just because he's gay. Oh no. See, I've plausibly denied it! So there! Haha, foiled again!
3. There's a gay mag called "Boyz", I'm led to believe, so I'm told, apparently it has rather a lot of pictures, pictures that I wouldn't enjoy at all, certainly not pictures that would give me an enormous throbbing erection, I can tell you, oh no, not me, certainly not, nope, no sir, definitely not, oh no, so what about that, eh? That just proves it!
4. They're all fucking paedos, the fuckers! Oh, er, sorry. I actually said it, didn't I? I meant: "The bloody Left, they're always accusing me of hating gays, in fact nothing could be further from the truth. I once wrote something saying they were all right, which means I have carte blanche to be a total cunt to the filthy shirtlifters for the rest of my natural life, doesn't it?"
Oh, and the article itself is a wad of badly written cuntery with yet more pisspoor gay jokes about Mandelson.