Remember yesterday Peter 'Peter' Mandleson announced - in the sense of not announcing, but telling his mates to make it known so journalists could 'understand'; basically an announcement but without having the balls to simply announce it - that he might look again at the thorny problem of people with families having the temerity to ask (with no guarantee or right for their request to be accepted, or even considered beyond a nod and a "Well I'll think about it") to work a bit more flexibly, and how that was affecting 'small businesses'. Not enormous businesses, the kind who lobby Government all the time, oh no not them: think of the poor small businesses, who are suffering in the credit crunch, and we really must do something to help them...
Well, the Mail has joined the crusade for 'small businesses':
A couple of questions:
1. Who the fuck designed that front page? Have you got the splash sub from the Daily Express in on a trial? That's fucking appalling. "Yes, so to make it really horrible on the eye, let's have white text on a black background and red ink, yes red ink, what a good idea, I've seen that on the Express so it must be the mark of a quality newspaper front page, they even do it on the Independent now and that's a really good paper, so yes, lots of red, and oh, a couple of fruity white women in the corner please, to illustrate the fact that fruity white women exist, I mean, to illustrate the terrible cost on middle England of the credit crunch and the bastards of regulation and red tape and tax and that..."
2. The Mail's plans to help 'small businesses'. They wouldn't by any chance also have the accidental and totally unintended knock-on effect of reducing costs for utterly enormous companies, such as Daily Mail General Trust, would they? I mean that would be completely accidental if they did, given that they're purely interested in helping the 'small businesses' who are the 'lifeblood of the economy', and not boosting their own share price.
But there you are. Until now, the Mail hadn't really challenged the Express in terms of 'worst front page ever' status, but I think this one comes close.