It's not a question of finding the hypocrisy at the Mail; it's trying to work out just how to describe the sheer brazenness of it, and peeling away layer after layer of poison to locate the nugget of pure filth.
Take eating disorders for example. Earlier this month the Hate pretended to give a shit about anorexia, while at the same time slagging off the size 16 woman who had entered Miss England, as well as a thin woman who had supposedly put on weight. Then they stuck the knife in to another thin woman for having what 'Femail' (oh the irony) decided was too much flab.
Today we have the sad story of a woman who died from anorexia. As before with the other 'serious' anorexia stories, this story is handled sensitively. But how does it sit alongside other attitudes in the same newspaper, and the attitudes of its own readers? Well, there are some kind comments on the story, but:
Sounds like she lost her own self in her study or care of other people. I once read that this is typical female anorexic trait? RIP to a nice but misguided lady.
Would she be one of these "Scientist Types" who tell us what to eat and what not to eat?
Perhaps she realised how worthless the 'professor of education' and 'academic nursing' models are, and fell into a decline.
You cunt. Seriously. You utter evil cunt. I'll kill you with my bare hands, you utter motherfucking bastard. Fuck you and your family. I hope you never, ever, ever breed. How dare you say things like this about a dead person. What benefit does it give anyone to say this?
But then what should we expect from Mailies? They struggle with the concepts of empathy and compassion, and ripped into John Prescott yesterday in typically unfunny playground sub-Littlecock fashion when it was announced he had endured years of misery with bulimia, another eating disorder. Many of them couldn't give a shit about other human beings, that's quite clear.
And while, on the one hand, the Mail can deal with issues around women's body image sensitively, 'Femail' wears an entirely different hat. You get this:
Cheryl Cole steps out looking painfully thin as friends worry she is 'wasting away'
Wonder why she's so troubled? Might it be all those millions of paps taking pictures of her all the fucking time for newspapers like the Mail? Could that be it, by any chance? But no, let's just point and say: "Urgh, thin!"
And then there's this:
'Working on my TV show is making me fat,' says Lily Allen (but her outfits don't help either)
Another 'Look at the pap pics of this thin/fat bitch!' story.
Lily Allen proudly debuted her sleek new figure late last year after dropping two dress sizes in just six weeks, declaring she'd "never been happier".
But her trimmer physique was fleeting, with the singer revealing the pounds have already crept back on.
Is it any wonder that eating disorders and body image problems are rife, when you have bollocks like this any time? Not that the Mail would link it to the problems of the woman whose story they covered elsewhere; not that the Mail give a shit that their readers are insulting, nasty, spiteful and vile towards dead people. None of it's connected, in their minds. If indeed minds are what they have.